In Praise of Cheesy Movies

I used to hang out with a few people who were movie snobs. At the time, I loved having intellectual discussions with all my little heart, and that's what the people in this group did. For awhile, I had fun. They were quite pretentious about the cinematography and the choices the director made, which was all well and good. I didn't mind; I enjoyed listening to them and just hanging out.  Hours and hours were spent discussing Rosebud, or the implications of Rear Window, over many cups of expensive coffee.  These guys went with me to see Nine and a Half Weeks, and walked out of the theater speaking glowingly of the cinematography. Good times.

I ended up dropping those guys(and gals) like bad carne quisada.   Part of intellectual discussion involves listening to other points of view, after all. Those self-identified smarties just didn't get my love of cheesy movies. My adoration of Clint Eastwood Westerns was abhorent to them. When I tried to explain how John Woo's use of birds in his movies was a completely legitimate form of symbolism, they laughed.  One of them even patted me on the head!   Those idiots just didn't get it, and they made fun of me because of their ignorance.  They wouldn't even consider seeing Hard Target, so they could make an informed opinion. Jean Claude Van Damme was beneath them.  I didn't even ask what they thought of Tango and Cash.  I just found a new group to hang out with.

I happen to like cheesy movies, and I don't care who knows it.  What better way to lose yourself after finding out you have cancer?  I had to get a little un-serious.  This weekend, I happily rewatched The Expendables 2, and I would have loved to see Roadhouse and Hard Target if I would have had the time.  And Silverado?  Oh yeah.  I settled for The Cabin in the Woods.

Cheesy movies are all about escape, much like a good book.  For the two hours or so that a cheesy movie is on the screen, it's not about you, or your problems.  It's about Patrick Swayze, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Nathan Fillion, etc., and their problems.  Problems that are very clearly defined, with minimal exposition, lots of fisticuffs, and probably a few explosions.  People want to kill the hero, and the hero does not want to die.  The hero wins, the bad guys get deceased in nasty ways...and roll credits. 

Cheesy movies are funny.  Oh, the funny isn't necessarily out there for all to see; a person has to be waiting for it.  Every single time a person tells Patrick Swayze in Roadhouse that they thought he'd be taller? Hilarious.   Bad puns, one liners that make you groan, witty comebacks are all  part of the experience.  If I have pop corn, I might even throw some at the screen, at least if the dog is around to clean up.

My husband doesn't always understand my obsessions, but he is willing to put up with them, for the most part.  He teases me mercilessly about my penchant for channel surfing until I find a cheesy movie that we happen to have sitting in our blu-ray collection, but he understands. We even like some of the same cheesy movies; Die Hard is our go to Christmas movie after the boy is asleep and we are arranging presents under the tree.

What are some cheesy movies that you like?  Let's bond over them!