Mr. and Mrs. Batman

Before I say anything else...I love Batman. I've read Batman comics since I was a kid. He is my very favorite-est superhero. I don't want to get any nasty letters from anybody.

But I've had an epiphany.

There has never been a villain like the Joker. He was, and is, one of a kind in the history of comic book criminals. He is an archetype, the Trickster. He is completely insane. The Joker has killed a lot of people over the years, including one of the Robins, in nasty and unpredictable ways. When I opened a comic with the Joker on the cover, I just knew that something bad was going to happen. The Batman was also one of a kind, an archetype, the Hero. Not a perfect hero, like that goody-two shoes Superman, but a hero with flaws. There are tons of old stories involving the Hero and the Trickster that have been handed down through time, but the world hadn't ever seen anything like Batman vs. the Joker.

When people marry and settle in for the long haul, all of their flaws are exposed to their spouse. In the world of villainy, flaws are big red buttons, just waiting to be pressed. The Joker always seems to know which buttons to press to get on Batman's last nerve. How did that insane criminal know which buttons to push?

The Joker and the Batman were married. Hitched. Ball and chain.

Married people tend to be a bit possessive of their spouses. They may not turn into slavering beasts when they see someone trying to flirt with their husband or wife, but they certainly don't like it. Sometimes that jealousy makes people do some pretty crazy things, like setting cars on fire or cutting up an entire wardrobe. The Joker got jealous when Batman went after other criminals.

Married couples sometimes take each other for granted, or get wrapped up in work and forget to make their marriage a priority. A lot of spouses will try to get the relationship back on track by doing something outrageous like picking a fight or cleaning the house naked. Most of the comics I read concerned the Joker doing something to make Batman very angry, just to get some quality time with him. Negative attention is still attention, and there's always the chance that Batman will decide to kiss and make up.

Married women will sometimes learn an extremely boring sport that their husband loves, like golf, and married men will sometimes set up a game to make it easier for their spouse to play. Isn't that adorable? The Joker wanted Batman to kill other people, because couples are supposed to share some activities. The Joker would even set up situations to make it easier for Batman to play along and kill, even though he knew that Batman had a strict "No Kill" policy.

The Joker would destroy/kill/eradicate anyone who tried to harm Batman. He even rescued Batman a couple of times! The Joker said several times that he was the only one allowed to kill Bats(awww--he had a pet name for Batman!). But he never did, despite lots and lots of opportunity. Batman was technically a vigilante, so if he killed the most insane criminal in the history of Gotham City, nobody would have been surprised. In spite of the strict "No Kill" policy, not one person would have blamed Batman for killing him after the Joker killed Robin. But the Batman never did, even when it would have been in the best interest of everyone.

Think about it. Those two just couldn't live without each other.