The Bad Spelling Gene

I won the school spelling bee in sixth grade. My brother won athletic trophies all the time; I did not. I've only won two trophies in my lifetime. I still have the trophy somewhere. It was THAT big of a deal. To me, anyway. I inherited my spelling abilities from my mom. I also inherited her OCD tendencies, and the older I get, the more often they pop up.

Last night I went to see my niece act in a play at her school. While I was there I noticed that there was a spelling error on the bulletin board. The word "heroes" was spelled "heros". I was proud of myself--I waited until the play was over before I weirded completely out. I could barely pay attention to the play because of that misspelled word, but as far as I know, I did not disrupt the play. Yay me!

I used to be able to calmly view spelling errors in public and not even bat an eye. Someone at a restaurant writes "Korn" as the vegetable of the day? I'd notice it, then move on. Back then, I did not feel a need to ask to see a manager. I did not run up to the chalkboard sign and erase the offending word or try to correct it. No problem.

These day, those misspelled words are Freddy Kreuger talons on tin to me. I understand what is happening. I know I am freaking out over nothing. I've told myself on several occasions that I was taking spelling just a little too seriously. I've also told myself that bad spelling is not the end of the world.

Except it is.

If I see a word misspelled on a sign or in a blog, it is as if that word has been blown up into huge letters, doused in gasoline, and set on fire. I can't not see it. And since I am a fixer, I have to fix it. Have to.

People don't really like it when I tell them that they misspelled a word. They think that I am rude. But that is too bad, because I am compelled to tell them that they screwed up the spelling. I try very hard not to be patronizing or snarky in anyway, however, I am telling someone that they screwed up. I really have been lucky that someone hasn't punched me right in the face. Nobody likes to know that they screwed up. Least of all, me!

I am trying to be less obnoxious about the spelling. There are times like tonight, however, that I just can't help it. I wanted to fix that sign with "heros" on it. I was like a junkie in need of a fix; circling every misspelled word with an invisible red pen. I finally just told someone. I had to take them to the bulletin board and explain in detail, and they looked at me as if I were nuts. And as I was talking, I decided that I might actually BE nuts.

At least about misspelled words.